2014: The year of thinking like a Badass

I don't make New Year's resolutions. If we're honest, no one ever sticks to them anyways. Instead, why not take a moment to consider where your thinking might be in a rut and how you can alter it. Goals are admirable but perhaps this year you'll get closer to where you want to be if you change how you think about getting there: rather than setting new resolutions with no idea how to achieve them.

I'm not saying life isn't going to throw a few curve balls your way in the coming year. But what happens is only the catalyst: how you view things and how you respond to them is what defines the outcome of your life.

Lately I've been watching a show called Suits. It is, of course, the best kind of television. It's flashy, dramatic, and sexy. But I've learned a few things from Harvey Specter, despite him being a fictional character. Lessons about how the right perspective can change the world and that making your own luck is the best way to get lucky. So that's what I'll be focusing on this year:

Seven Life Lessons from Harvey Specter

1. Win before you even start

Harvey wins often because he closes every case he can before he goes to court. The take away? Don't fixate on all the ways that things could go badly. Don't waste your time and resources planning a rearguard action against problems that haven't even happened yet.

Think outside the box. Try and solve your situations before they become problems. Then you are free to move on to bigger and better things

Remember: Self-fulfilling prophecy can be good and bad.

2. Life without risk is bland

Harvey takes risks. Sometimes he gambles with money or his reputation or he takes a chance on someone no one else will. But the possibility of loss exists. Those risks make for good TV but what makes for good TV also makes for a more interesting life.

Risks are scary but the truth is that people who succeed in life do so because they took risks. Playing life safe does mean that you can mitigate the unexpected. But the best moments in life are unexpected... so if you don't take risks where does that leave you?

Safe and bored.

3. Learn to read people better

Harvey wins cases and poker because he knows people. Admittedly, it is TV and Harvey knows everything because it's in the script. It isn't as easy in real life.

But in real life, learning to read people is invaluable. Life is people. Taking the time to listen to the things that people say and the things they don't say. It gives you insight into situations, compassion for other people, and makes other people like you.

All three of those things are powerful tools

4. Nothing is more valuable than your integrity

The show has created a character that is honest. I like that there is a character on TV committed to ideals like honesty and fair play.

Integrity is something highly admired in our world. More so because it is a quality that appears to be more and more rare. Stick to your morals even if it appears to leave you at a disadvantage. The truth is you might lose out on the immediate situation by refusing to compromise. But the long term benefits of being known for honesty, loyalty, and integrity far outweigh the losses.

5. Don't let "unfair" derail you: work for your luck

One of the hardest things in life is to be on the wrong end of unfair. Life isn't like TV and we all know it. It seems like some people get all the breaks and the rest of us are left to fight over the scraps.

Waiting for unfairness to resolve itself isn't the right course of action though. Those people that seem to get all the breaks? It's because they work for it. Luck isn't really a thing. It's not a ghostly cloud of goodwill that floats around the world.

Luck happens when you work hard.

6. Don't just wait for your life to happen

I`m not implying that having dreams is a bad thing. Harvey`s character is emotionally cold. I, personally, like the hope that having a dream provides. Thinking big is important. If you don`t aim for something that might be unattainable, you`ll never get anywhere.

But dreams will never happen if you don`t envision how to get there. Just waiting and hoping isn`t enough. The difference between dreams and goals is the steps you take to get there.

7. Don't give up and don't back down

All of the previous lessons are handy and helpful. But the truth is that life pitches curve balls once in a while. There`s no denying that. When the going gets rough, that`s when my last life lesson from Harvey comes in handy.

No matter how bad life gets, don`t give up. It`s not just that you need to keep your confidence up. Don`t give up on finding a solution. If you`re stuck in a corner, think outside the box. There is always a solution.

Sometimes adversity generates the most creative solutions!

Health at Zero: Waiting to Respawn

It was bound to happen. I'm just surprised it took this long. But I've finally come down sick. My throat is sore and I'm running a mild fever. And of course all this the day before a final exam. If that wasn't enough, I spent the whole day drinking tea for my sore throat that turned out to contain an allergen that gave me a migraine!

I spent a large portion of the day napping off my migraine. I definitely did the reading that I needed to do but I can't say the information really stuck. To be completely honest, I pretty much just skimmed between closing my eyes. It's the kind of situation that could give you an ulcer. I know a lot of people in my University that would come unglued. But I'm learning a lot about life, the way things happen, and how to deal.

The fact of the matter is: there is nothing I can do about this. The body breaks down. After four months of managing full time school, part time work, and the rest of my life, I finally ran out of stamina. It's like my little health bar ran down and there's no health pack in sight. I suppose I could spend my time adding to the situation by piling on the mental stress: I'm going to fail the exam! How can I succeed if I can't study? This is terrible! This is going to ruin my grade, my GPA, and possibly my life!

But the truth is that spending the day healing is probably better for me anyways. I have time tomorrow morning to review the material and fill in any gaps that occurred in my migraine impacted brain. Whatever grade I get will be better than nothing at all, my other classes will balance out my GPA and I'm only in my second year of uni. My life is far from ruined.

It has been a very long journey for me to arrive at this place, mentally speaking. It's such a cliche for someone to tell you, "Just let it go". But if you can learn how to do it, life becomes so much better. It isn't that consequences do not occur nor that pain does not have an impact. It's just that if you can remember that it won't be permanent... that eventually something new will come along... if you can learn to be excited about the Possibilities you don't even know about... suddenly stressors just become potholes in the journey of life rather than roadblocks!

Instead of stopping short, just bounce your way across the rough and keep on going. Maybe it's lessons I've learned from video games. But when things are dire, you can always wait until you respawn and try again. Of course, in games you get to replay the exact same level until you can do it perfectly and in life you have play a new level every single day. But if you don't let the unexpected derail you then you'll have that much more of a running start when you hit the ground on your next adventure.

And if you don't think that life is an adventure... you're not doing it right!

Recklessly Blown Away

Being careful is something that is deeply ingrained in us. It's one of the first lessons our parents teach us (often in a panic!) and the lesson only gets reinforced with time. Be careful when you cross the street. Be careful when you talk to strangers. Be careful when you fall in love. Be careful when you choose a career. Be careful with the baby. Be careful that you don't fall... Be careful...

I'm not advocating dangerous behaviour. Nor am I suggesting you should endanger your life or the lives of people around you. What I am suggesting is that perhaps being careful is not all that it's cracked up to be. Recently I've become more reckless. This is largely due to the fact that I'm exhausted from studying, working, and living, and I simply don't have any energy left into "caring".

I feel that caring, in this sense, should be defined. It's different than sparing a thought for a loved one's safety. It's different than passion for a hobby, sport, or interest. Caring, in the sense of "Be Careful", is to anticipate negative outcomes, let worry for that possible reality set in, and then act as if it has already happened.

So I don't have enough energy to "care"... to borrow troubles from an uncertain future and let that worry cloud the moment. But instead of finding myself in the throes of disaster, I find that my life feels free. Not caring, for me, has become the real version of living in the now. It's not that I'm unaware of the possible consequences of my actions. It's that, until such time as a consequence occurs, I will chose to live as if it hasn't happened yet. Worrying about something before it happens doesn't make things any easier when it comes time to actually deal. All worrying does is ruin the moment you're in.

I love this quote. The way it begins speaks to people who spend all their time caring. The fact that She is in the storm is adventure enough: good for her. And those people celebrate the fact that She did not blow away. Because they are being careful. Blown away is reckless... unpredictable... undesirable.

But what those people don't realize is: if She doesn't allow the wind to blow her away She will never discover new sights, new places, new thoughts... She might encounter calamity:

But then again... she might not.